So it turns out the easiest way was just to ask Him. I trust Him, I love Him, and I can only show that by being completely honest with Him. If I sat on my feelings for too long, then in a way I would have been deceitful by keeping my blog and my thoughts from him.
How could I ask him to by my Dom if I am not ready to submit. By submit I mean to lay my soul bare, and be honest.
So He said... That sounds like fun. LOL... I was not sure what I expected him to say. But I should have trusted in him to be ok with it.
He read my blog and agreed with how I summed up our life so far. That was good to hear, it means I was not the only one along for the ride, and we were experiencing this together.
So now what? I asked him to think about what he wants from this new arrangement. I guess I wait.
I explained that I find it easier to write this stuff down than to verbalize it. He agreed that he does sometimes too. So I am going to use this as a way of expressing what I can't say.
Topping from the bottom has always scared me. I think this fear contributed to us not communicating well the first time around. I still don't have the crux of it yet.
Slow and steady. Getting back into the mindset will take time for both of us.
I am really glad I took the plunge and asked him.... But I might want to change that answer after the first time I get my butt spanked!